{"id":8313,"date":"2016-12-27t11:14:54","date_gmt":"2016-12-27t19:14:54","guid":{"rendered":"\/\/www.catharsisit.com\/act\/?p=8313"},"modified":"2016-12-29t17:12:24","modified_gmt":"2016-12-30t01:12:24","slug":"expert-advice-parents-new-years-resolutions","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"//www.catharsisit.com/act/wp-json/wp/v2/posts/\/\/www.catharsisit.com\/act\/expert-advice-parents-new-years-resolutions\/","title":{"rendered":"expert advice to help your teen make (and keep!) new year\u2019s resolutions"},"content":{"rendered":"

new year\u2019s resolutions. they\u2019re ambitious, yet intimidating; full of hope, yet all too easily forgotten. and for teens, they\u2019re just plain overwhelming.<\/p>\n

\u201cwhile balanced perspective can be challenging for adults, it is often daunting for teenagers. impulsivity reigns supreme during adolescence \u2013 often limiting our aspirations,\u201d says psychotherapist and mental gym<\/a> founder, bill benson, who advises parents on how to approach the subject of new year\u2019s resolutions with teens. <\/p>\n

so how can parents help their teens make lasting new year\u2019s resolutions? we asked mothers, fathers, family therapists, and parenting experts to contribute their top tips. their answers may surprise you…<\/p>\n

\"parents<\/a><\/p>\n

1. set feasible goals.<\/h2>\n

instead of brainstorming grandiose life makeovers with your teen, focus on smaller, more actionable items. varda meyers epstein, kars4kids<\/a> writer and mother-of-12, suggests choosing ten little things and concentrating on those, like laying out school clothes the night before or dedicating ten minutes in the morning to a nutritious breakfast. \u201cany goal that is \u2018can-do\u2019 is appropriate for a teen,\u201d meyers epstein says, \u201cthey already know they can succeed with them, and it gets them moving forward in a proactive, positive way.\u201d <\/p>\n

2. practice \u201caccepting,\u201d not \u201cexpecting.\u201d<\/h2>\n

\u201csupport your kid\u2019s aspirations by \u2018accepting\u2019 rather than \u2018expecting,\u2019\u201d says benson, \u201ckindly step outside of your own boxed perspective when listening to your child\u2019s hopes, dreams, desires, and goals \u2013 you just may learn something by considering the fresh perspective of a developing mind.\u201d<\/p>\n

as a way to advance this suggestion into practice, try actively listening to your teen\u2019s new year\u2019s resolutions, then repackage and repeat them back to your teen, before tweaking them with your own suggestions. doing so will make your teen feel heard and will create a safe space to further conversation. <\/p>\n

3. don\u2019t call them \u201cresolutions.\u201d<\/h2>\n

\u201cwe don’t make new year’s resolutions,\u201d states homeschool base<\/a> editor, sarah tippett, \u201cwe set goals and plan! of course they\u2019re still new year’s resolution[s], but we approach things very differently.\u201d<\/p>\n

so what\u2019s tippett\u2019s key to helping her teens make and keep these aspirations? \u201cmake the goals very specific and formulate a plan or a checklist of items that need to be done to achieve these goals.\u201d <\/p>\n

4. set goals as a family.<\/h2>\n

renaming new year\u2019s resolutions isn\u2019t the only way tippett helps her teens achieve their new year\u2019s goals. \u201cwe also set goals as a family,\u201d tippett states, claiming accountability as the driving force, \u201cthe best way to achieve a goal is to tell everyone you know.\u201d following tippett\u2019s advice, try encouraging your teen to keep their sibling updated on their goal to read more. as a parent, follow up with your teen by asking questions or provoking discussion around their resolution throughout the year. set goals as a family (like going on more walks or making sure there\u2019s always something green on the dinner table), and make it a fun challenge to accomplish them together! <\/p>\n

5. make it personal.<\/h2>\n

\u201cwhen your goal involves people who are external factors you can\u2019t control, it will not end well,\u201d tippett warns. just as there are many good ways to help your teen make new year\u2019s resolutions, there are also many avenues to avoid as well. tippett\u2019s own child attempted to set a new year\u2019s resolution that involved improving the relationship between himself and a co-worker. \u201cyou can’t expect anyone else to ‘go along’ with your resolution,\u201d tippett cautions, \u201calthough my teen tried to do a great job, the co-worker was unresponsive.\u201d <\/p>\n

6. write it down.<\/h2>\n

\u201ci like to tell my kids to write down 10 things they can do to improve their lives — in even a very small way — and to work through that list,\u201d says meyers epstein. other parents agree: \u201cwrite it down on a piece of paper or tell your teen to put it in their phone,\u201d says parenting expert, cherie corso<\/a>, \u201cevery day, your teen will look at that resolution. by seeing it, he or she will remember to take actions towards that goal.\u201d <\/p>\n

so now that you know how to make new year\u2019s resolutions, what types of goals should you help your teens set? as test prep experts, it would be downright irresponsible of us not to advocate for resolutions that can help your teen achieve their future college goals. while you\u2019re planning 2017 resolutions with your teen, include feasible goals to help them improve their act scores; like following a personalized act study plan<\/a> or committing to raising their score by 10 points with these easy tips<\/a>. in addition, our experts came up with a few additional suggestions (in addition to the ones above) that implement their advice, including: <\/p>\n